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New Years Jokes

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS YOU WON'T
BE ABLE TO KEEP IF YOU'RE A NERD

 16. I resolve... I resolve to... I resolve to, uh... I resolve to, uh, get my, er... I resolve to, uh, get my, er, off-line work done, too!

15. I will stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning... 4:30 is much more practical. 

14. When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL... LOL!" 

 13. I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person. 

12. I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses. 

11. I will stop sending e-mail to my roommate. 

 10. I will not buy magazines with AOL disks bound in just to get another 1.44MB disk.

9. I resolve to work with neglected children... my own. 

8. I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm I answer e-mail. 

 7. When I subscribe to a newsgroup or mailing list, I will read all the mail I get from it.

6. I will stop using, "So, what's your URL?" as a pickup line.

5. No more downloads from alt.binaries.*

 4. I resolve to back up my new 400 GB hard drive daily... well, once a week... monthly, perhaps... 

3. I will spend less than five hour a day on the Internet. 

2. I will limit my top ten lists to ten items.

1. I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it. 


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Submiter Information

Azeem  ( Jan 03, 2008 )
azeemaslam295@hotmail.com